The Scientific States of Relationships

We watch so many love stories, lifetime movies, and read books that go through the phases of love. We watch, absorb, learn from their mistakes, but when we are in the storm, why don't we bring that knowledge to our own battlefield?

I want to talk about conflict in relationships, but give a new perspective that may help you understand being in the moment with your significant other.

Gas

The gas state is the most free. The molecules move fast and are able to move freely. In this state, the relationship between molecules are not connected and often bounce into each other or through. Sounds familiar?

Plasma

I wanted to talk about plasma because it is very important for gas to experience this. Plasma comes as a form of electricity or interaction within the gas to increase its speed; sometimes producing electricity. Gas state can be seen as lustful, exciting, and just what the body needed.

Deposition

The phase from gas to solid is unique because most relationships require a growth into a problem. At this point, three things could be possibly occurring in the relationship. One, the free molecules (Lovers) are forced to recognize the isolation they both need from each other. Two, there is an outside force that is put upon them to create this irrational reality. Lastly, relational intentions were never processed and done to create a minor need.

The hardest part about this state is that you are simply reaction. Make your intentions CLEAR. Your goal for this moment is to bring yourself to a place to be able to listen to your partner. Slow your molecules to ease the irrational steps that might take place. You might even have to get over yourself to make it happen.

Liquid

The Liquid state is the moment of cohesion. The moment where molecules are used together to flow with the surface it impacts. This state is ideal because it allows fluidity to be supreme. Like relationships, following boundaries, staying connected, and having the ability to adapt to the environment is imperative. However, it lacks the ability to move freely like gas, but gains the foundation of unity which we want at the end of any relationship. Your goal for this moment is to ALWAYS check the temperature of your relationship. Although this is the ideal state, not checking the temperature can lead to molecules speeding up. Do you know how to check in with your partner?

Solid

The solid state is the point where molecules have completely connected to the point nothing can pass through or freely move. This state is unique because this is what we think we want. We want our partners to never question our motives, history, or even acknowledge the differences. this could be considered either the very beginning or ending of a relationship. To elaborate, this can be seen in the beginning because there is no movement due to there being "Nothing wrong" with our partner.

We allow ourselves to be comfortable in the newness of the relationship, ignorant to the dynamics both truly create. On the other hand, if you are at the ending of your relationship you seem to just not get anywhere. It might take an objective source (a counselor perhaps) or a heart to heart talk about what functions in this relationships.

Sublimation

The state of matter that goes from solid to gas is very unique in a relationship. This can mean two things. One, the problem that was looming over the relationship finally found it's way out. Two, the volcano finally popped. But how is that good?

The worst thing in a relationship you can do is to stop caring. Although the gas state is freely and irrational at times, the fact that there is MOVEMENT in the relationship is imperative. Catharsis is the breaking point to the truth of your relationship.

Triple Point

The trifecta that we all want to achieve. At this moment, solid, liquid, and gas are coexisting. The temperature and pressure are finally on one accord.

Moving forward: Begin looking at your relationship or potential partners and see what state you are in. Are you two in the same state?